What is Resilience?

Resilience is an inner strength that gives us the ability to cope well and confidently with challenges in life. Dr Robert Brooks, an esteemed researcher in the area of resilience describes some of the beliefs and skills of resilient children as:

- believing that there are adults that love them unconditionally

- believing that there are adults who support and encourage them

- having faith in their own problem-solving skills

- being able to exercise self-discipline

- are hopeful and optimistic

- recognising their own strengths

- viewing mistakes as experiences from which they can learn

In Drs Brooks' and Goldstein’s wonderful book on Raising Resilient Children, they describe a resilient child as an emotionally healthy child able to successfully confront challenges and bounce back from setbacks.

Why Should Parents Teach Children Resilience?

Resilient children are hopeful and value themselves as part of their communities. Research indicates that resilient children are good at overcoming everyday stresses and bigger setbacks in life. Successful adults are often praised for their ability to deal effectively with mistakes and failures and their determination to follow a path that is important to them.

By teaching children to think in a resilient way, parents are giving their children skills to cope with the challenges of the playground and the classroom. Perhaps equally important is that by teaching resilience, parents are more likely to raise children willing to take calculated risks to achieve important and fulfilling results in their personal and professional lives as adults.

How Can Parents Teach Children Resilience?

Parents who use empathy in their parenting, openly appreciate their children’s strengths and help children to understand that they can learn from mistakes are well on the way to raising resilient children. Parents can also help children to learn problem solving skills and teach children to set realistic goals.